Hello to our lovely, naughty, and cheeky gentleman out there. As the best girl bar in Saigon, we have some excellent experience regarding what Vietnamese girls look for when they date. These tips are mainly to help all our foreign friends or some of our regulars who have recently arrived in Vietnam looking to meet the Vietnamese woman of their dreams.
However, it is really important that you understand what Vietnamese women are like as they are very different from girls in the west. She may be a bit conservative with her values and traditions, which are quite different from those girls you are used to dating back home.
If you are a foreigner and have never been to Vietnam, you may be jumping into a murky sea where you will need to learn some unique skills to navigate successfully. Some relationships with Vietnamese girls have ended prematurely just because of cultural differences. But worry not, as this article will take you through the tips to date good women in Vietnam.
How To Date A Vietnamese Girl
1. Chivalry is Celebrated
You’re expected to pay for your date, well, at least the first few dates anyways; most Vietnamese girls, however, will offer to pay for their share of food, drinks, and activities. The gold-digging ones, however, won’t even lift a finger, so watch out now.
Some of you guys out there will balk at having to spend a dime on your dates. We get it; you’re a new-age guy (#cheap). You embrace the idea of equality and how men and women should be treated the same.
But paying for your date isn’t necessarily bad; it’s a great way to screen out girls who are only interested in using you as an ATM. This group of girls typically dont even bother to offer to help you pay for some of the activities after several dates.
If you find yourself in this position, you should swiftly show them the door since most Vietnamese girls want to be seen as independent and offer to pay for their share of meals, drinks, and whatnot. These are the keepers in the ones you should try to find; however, men are prepared to pay for your date.
2. Traditional Roles Remain
You’re expected to lead, unlike in the West, where men have lost their ball sacks and let their women boss them around like little puppies, further losing more and more respect for them.
In Vietnam, you’re expected to lead as a man or face being single sad, and alone. Girls don’t just see you as an equal they see you as a man or a leader, so who they can follow and trust will lead them towards the path of success.
There’s no asking her where you want to go, what you want to eat, what you want to do, the type of questions you’re the man, so you decide. She’ll offer some input on indecisiveness, but this kills attraction for Vietnamese girls. So if you want to embrace your masculinity and start acting like a man, Vietnamese girls will be your cup of tea.
Vietnamese girls love guys to act like a gentleman, Vietnamese girls are conservative and traditional a lot of the man from the old days were more brutish rather than gentlemanly especially from asian countries add to this fact that kdrama has been sweeping through the country and you got loads of Vietnamese girls wanting to meet a guy that knows how to act like a gentleman.
Simple things like opening the door for a woman, moving her motorbike for her or even given her your jacket or shirt if she’s cold goes a very long way. In fact my boyfriend at the time used this very same trick when he was courting me at the CGV cinema watching a movie when I was complaining that it was cold.
Now if you’ve been to a movie theater here in Vietnam then you’ll know they’d like to crank up the AC and there I was shivering and hugging myself so like all gentlemen he took off one of his shirts and gave it to me. I was so happy and was hugging his shirt like a baby cuddling up against teddy bear I think he knew he won a big brownie points that night with me.
3. Serious Applicants Only Need Apply
Many Vietnamese girls date to look for serious relationships; casual relationships aren’t a thing here except for the most liberal girls. Usually, those girls have a few screws loose, having gone through and been plowed by dozens of guys.
If you’re looking for a nice traditional girl to settle down with and potentially marry one day, then Vietnam is incredible. If you want to increase your notch count quickly and play the field well, you will be disappointed.
Many Vietnamese girls date, intending to get married later down the line. At a minimum, they expect a serious relationship type of commitment from you. And here’s one last thing: those girls into the casual relationship usually sleep with several guys at once; you’ll most likely either catch something off of her or become Eskimo brothers with your friend.
Don’t expect sex on the first date. Most Vietnamese girls will expect you to court them for several days before giving up their prized possessions, and even then, that won’t come easy. Once you get them back to your place, prepare to spend hours plowing away before she decides to give in to you. It’s not that she doesn’t want to give it to you. It’s that she’s been conditioned by society not to appear easy her reputation is on the line. If you try to bring the girl back to your place on the first date, usually this is what will happen either she won’t go inside, or she’ll be hesitant to sit beside you once inside. She’ll give you a lot of resistance before making excuses and storming off.
The ones you do end up bedding on the first date aren’t exactly girlfriend-material types of girls, based on my experience. They make up a very, very small percentage of the girls you encounter here.
4. Vietnamese Girls Comes As A Package
Many Vietnamese girls still live at home with their parents or relatives; this point goes hand in hand with the last point. Most Vietnamese girls still live at home with their parents or relatives, which means you can’t have late-night dates with them, and they can’t sleep over at your place. If you have dates with Vietnamese girls, you must plan accordingly.
5. Displays Of Affection With A Vietnamese Girl
Public displays of affection or a big no-no, forget about kissing Vietnamese girls while you’re outside unless you want an angry mob to attack you. Okay, well, maybe that’s an exaggeration. Still, your date will feel shamed and shunned by the locals. The most you could potentially get away with in shows of public displays of affection is hand-holding, hugging, and nothing else. It better be kept for the bedroom.
You can find more information about customs, values and etiquette here.
6. Get Used To Having Texting Thumb Injuries
If you hate texting or calling on the phone, you will be in for a rude awakening because you will be expected to do this practically every day. When you’re in a relationship with a Vietnamese girl, failure to do so will result in our accusing you of not caring about her and not being committed. Yeah, I know, high maintenance, right, but that’s what you get when you want to date a beautiful Vietnamese girl.
So Are You Ready To Date A Vietnamese Girl?
Being the best girlie bar in Ho Cho Minh City, We are one of few places that regularly have interactions between Vietnamese girls and foreign men. In fact we have actually had 10 marriages from guys meeting their dream girl at Kims Tavern in 12 years of business. We know there are more tips we can add and we will be sure to do so in the near future.
How about you guys, what should Vietnamese girls know when dating a foreigner? How should they behave, what should they watch out for? Please leave a comment below and let us know.